Copyright S. Giron 2013 Not to be copied. |
It's been challenging, at times, to keep an optimistic front in these turbulent times. The economy is a disaster with absurdly high unemployment rates. Sure there are loads of minimum wage jobs but housing costs are so high that paying the rent and eating, not to mention raising kids, makes them laughable. I had a job where it almost cost me more in gas and buying a new wardrobe than the wage I was paid. In fact, when the brakes on my car blew, that would have been more than a week's wages and I still had to pay the rent.
How does anyone do it? How can the big wigs sleep at night?
The building where I reside is very old and last week, the upstairs unit flooded into mine. Now my ceiling is falling off in chunks, the floor is warping, closet destroyed, and so on. There have been other concerns here too and I've been wishing like crazy to get out of here.
Well, now I'll be moving but only to another unit in the same building. So I got a partial wish. Finances don't include a real move any time soon. But at least it will be different. Shake up the vibes. I've already done the numbers and they look good. Here, I'm living in an eleven vibration. Not cool for new beginnings, job hunting and such. It was good for learning and healing. The fact that the apartment is literally exploding to move me out means it's time to leave the nest. The new place has a better for me number. I feel more optimistic already.
As for jobs and housing, I'm not the only one. Hundreds of thousands of us are in the exact same boat. Work, no work, when you have work you're just as broke because it costs to go to work, and on the cycle goes. Rent eats up majority of paycheck so one can never get ahead let alone save for an overinflated house or pay a daycare.
Of course, there are good careers where people are smart enough to start young and then grow their business, practice, whatever, and retire in their fifties or sixties.
There are all types. Addicts, single moms, students, middle class, upper class...
However, being an artist is difficult in this climate. When I was younger, I could balance my kids, a part time job, and writing. If I grew bored of my job, I quit and got a new one. I never received minimum wage except as a waitress but I made monster tips.
Now, the kids are grown and jobs are scarce. No more job hopping. Hell, I barely know what the newest programs are although I'm current about most in the publishing industry.
Just when I think I'm going to drown, I receive an editing assignment or a tarot party. Sometimes both. In recent times, I've also had to rely on my parents. Thank god THEY had common sense and are able to help me and the kids!
So times are tough. Then they are good. Then they are tough. You can always count on change. There are always friends and family around who will truly help you if they can. Often, random strangers.
Tonight, Dorian returned from his job working reception at the dance studio. He was bursting with excitement.
"Someone gave me tap shoes," he said and showed them to me. Beautiful condition, expensive tap shoes.
"Some guy just came into the studio and asked if anyone wanted his old tap shoes. They fit me so he gave them to me."
Now, to fully understand this miracle, you have to know that Dorian has very hard to fit feet, especially for dance shoes. He's very wide.
But the shoes fit.
Dorian's current tap shoes died a couple of weeks ago. They'd been on their last legs for a few months and we'd talked a couple of times about how he needed new ones. However, his finally blew up. He'd been afraid to tell me that they'd actually fallen apart because he knew we didn't have the money to buy new ones.
But now, just in time for his teaching tap course next week, a random stranger has given him tap shoes.
We gave our thanks to the Universe and Powers That Be.
We are very grateful for this most wonderful miracle.
We both have been practising positive manifestation techniques so we joke that it could have been either one of us who opened up to the possibility of new tap shoes.
Copyright S. Giron 2013. Not to be copied without permission. |
I've had other wonderful things happen to me in recent weeks as well. I was able to go to New Orleans for the World Horror Convention thanks to the wonderful generosity of my parents and friends who gave me a free room. When William went to pay the bill, half was already paid. I think I know who paid for me but whatever happened, it was an amazing miracle. They were happy as well.
Many odd and serendipitous experiences haunted me in New Orleans. I felt a kinship with my birth city as I've never felt anywhere except perhaps Manhattan. Bourbon Street revitalized me. Perhaps because I'd come out of a year of pure hell, I was ready to break free. I don't know. But there were many aspects of magic at that convention and I believe I brought some of it back with me. Each golden moment I cherished, I thank the universe for allowing, against all odds, the ability for me to finally see what I was, where I came from. I finally understood who I am. The final piece of the 11 vibration that overpowers my life right now has clicked into place.
The night the flood happened in my apartment, I was staying with Michael Rowe for a couple of days while his husband was away. It was last week, long before the freak rainstorm flood action on Monday. We were both working on our books when I received a text from Dorian at one in the morning that water was pouring from the light fixture in his ceiling into his room. There was a crack growing larger right across the room and water was trickling down. My room was worse. So we told him to cover up the computers, etc. and come to Michael's. The damage stopped in the morning and now it's just drying out and falling down.
The point is that it was lucky I was at Michael's where it was nice and comfy and Dorian was able to drive over to join us even if it was three in the morning by then. We didn't even get a parking ticket and one ALWAYS gets a parking ticket in that part of Toronto after midnight.
It's the little things. And big things. And thoughtful things.
It can be easy to get dragged down into pits of despair when aspects of your life aren't connecting with where you believe they should be but it's vitality important to keep focussed on what you want from life. It's not always easy to get what you want but you'll always get what you need, as the song goes. Keep your attention on living your life as you believe you deserve and you will find moments of comfort in turbulent times. They come in weird, odd little ways.
I've had strange little experiences that I won't share just yet. Where I think something so hard that events tumble along until it happens in some random way. However, that isn't always easy to manifest and the repercussions are as yet unrealized as I play with ideas. I don't mean to hurt anyone ever but just want a bit more comfort in the lives of my sons and myself.
So when tap shoes and free rooms come along, they are special treats that allow us to have experiences we otherwise couldn't participate in.
I've been very blessed in so many ways and I hang on to these moments with great gratitude. Keep positive. Love each moment of your life and give thanks for the harsh lessons that you learn. There is always balance and there are always good times after the bad.
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